


The Kent Family Rules of Present-Gifting

by josephina_x



Series: Clexmas Stocking Stuffers 2015 [3]
Category: Smallville
Genre: Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Christmas Presents, Gen, Gift Giving, Shopping
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-25
Updated: 2016-01-25
Packaged: 2018-05-16 04:25:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5814028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/josephina_x/pseuds/josephina_x
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Luthor family traditions for Christmas suck. (Mostly because there aren’t any -- Lionel hasn’t allowed any such celebrations since Lillian died.) Some of the Kent traditions that Lex knows are... <i>normal</i>. Sort of. For strange and Kent-defined values of ‘normal’. (For Lexian values, however...)</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Kent Family Rules of Present-Gifting

**Author's Note:**

> Title: The Kent Family Rules of Present-Gifting  
> Author: [josephina_x](http://josephina-x.livejournal.com)  
> Fandom: Smallville  
> Pairing: Clark+Lex, Jonathan  
> Rating: G  
> Spoilers: old-school Clex, general for early seasons  
> Word count: 800+  
> Summary: The Luthor family traditions for Christmas suck. (Mostly because there aren’t any -- Lionel hasn’t allowed any such celebrations since Lillian died.) Some of the Kent traditions that Lex knows are... _normal_. Sort of. For strange and Kent-defined values of ‘normal’. (For Lexian values, however...)  
>  Warnings: Un-beta'd.  
> Disclaimer: Not mine, not-for-profit.  
> Comments: Yes, please! :)  
> Author's Note: Clexmas 2015 stocking stuffer #3, prompt: Gifts
> 
> Originally posted to LJ at Clexmas [here](http://clexmas.livejournal.com/1114464.html).

~*~*~*~*~*~

“You can’t give him a truck.”

“Okay.”

“Or a car.”

“Okay.”

“Or an SUV.”

“--I think I‘ve got the picture, Mr, Kent,” Lex said with no small exasperation. “No personal, drivable four-wheeled conveyances for Clark.”

“No ‘bikes or any other type of motorcycle, either,” Jonathan said firmly, as though he thought Lex was trying to sneakily find a way around his edicts, somehow.

Like that would work. Jonathan would just veto it after the fact. Lex stifled a sigh.

“ _Luthor_.”

“Yes, fine, no motorcycles or bikes of any kind, either,” Lex dutifully repeated. “Is there anything I _am_ allowed to give him?”

“Nothing big.”

Oh, what he wouldn’t give for a proper set of descriptors, rather than a single hazy adjective.

“Define ‘big’,” Lex said with a sinking feeling.

“You need me to define ‘big’ for you?” Jonathan gave him an incredulous look.

“That would be helpful, yes, please.”

Jonathan Kent stood there and stared at him.

‘Argh,’ thought Lex. --Why couldn’t he just be friends with somebody who was also rich and therefore had sane parents with reasonable standards for gift-giving, i.e., none that would prevent him from giving what he thought said person-in-question might actually like?

...Right, because rich people were all assholes who he would never want to try and be friends with, unlike Clark. Nevermind, then.

“You need me to define ‘big’ for you.” Jonathan pinched the bridge of his nose like he was getting a headache.

Well, at least the feeling was mutual.

“I don’t suppose it would be too late for me to opt to have this discussion with Mrs. Kent, instead?” Lex tried.

At the flat glare he got from Mr. Kent for daring to suggest such a thing, Lex figured that was a ‘no’.

“What if I ran it by you first?” Lex said almost desperately.

Jonathan gave him an odd look. “You want me to go out Christmas present shopping with you for Clark?”

Thaaaaat ...was _not_ anywhere **remotely** where Lex had been going with that, but Lex would take it!

“Yes!” Lex said, springing on the idea like it was trying to get away.

Jonathan turned away from the engine he had been fiddling with to stare at Lex full-on. “What?”

“I said yes. I want us to go out Christmas shopping together for Clark,” because Lex would be damned if he’d let Mr. Kent back out on him now.

Mr. Kent’s jaw dropped. He looked a little sick. Perhaps somewhat horrified. Well, good -- Lex could _work_ with that!

“ _Or_ ,” Lex said, smelling blood in the water and going in for the kill, “If that’s too much trouble for you, then you can just sit back and rest easy, trusting my own good judgment, and accept whatever completely reasonable thing I manage to find that I give to him, instead.”

Mr. Kent snapped his mouth closed and clenched his jaw, then narrowed his eyes at him. Crud, he must’ve oversold it a bit there.

“Fine,” Mr Kent said. “We’ll go shopping.” He picked up a rag and started cleaning his hands off. “ _Right now._ ”

“Right... now?” Lex said.

“Yes,” said Jonathan Kent, as he headed for the bar doors. “Right _now_. At a place where I know we’ll be able to find something, that won’t be a waste of my time, out in the middle of the holiday rush, along with everybody else in town and their dog who are all doing their last-minute shopping out there.”

‘Oh, I see,’ thought Lex. It was a **dare**. And Clark’s father thought he’d back down from it. --More fool, he. Lex wasn’t _about_ to turn down an opportunity to be able to give Clark a gift (or two!) that his friend might actually be allowed to keep.

“Well, then,” Lex said with a grin that was more of a baring of teeth. “What _are_ we waiting for?”

~*~*~*~*~*~

“We are _never_ doing that again, Luthor,” Jonathan informed him, as they staggered back to the truck.

“Agreed,” said Lex, because that had been downright _awful_. Stuck in a pedestrian shopping mall with Jonathan Kent for five hours. God.

Lex barely managed to get the passenger’s side door open, to climb up and collapse into the seat.

“Just, one question,” Lex panted out, as Jonathan shoved the keys into the ignition.

“What’s that,” the man grumbled out at him.

“How do you define ‘big’?”

Jonathan **groaned**.

~*~*~*~*~*~

“Lex! This is great! --And I can keep this?” Clark said, almost painfully excited, as he hugged Lex and then looked up at his dad, bright-eyed and hopeful.

“Yes, Clark,” his father said, and Clark let out an enthusiastic “YES!” and hugged Lex all over again.

It was so worth it.

~*~*~*~*~*~


End file.
